THAT DAMN CHICKEN

Childhood is fraught with perils. We can all recall at least one terrible aspect of our own younger years that have kept us warm at nights with deeply scarring nightmares and crushing regrets. For some, it’s bullying; others, it’s the secret knowledge that they’re fascinated with glitter-paint and mascara. I never had a problem with bullying, or mascara. No, my childhood terror came in a very different form. It was a damn huge chicken named Augustus, and he looked a lot like this.

chicken_cockrels_22_-137924

 

Actually, he looked more like this…

 

Beastkong JPEG

A dread-beast spawned in the blackest pits of hell and regurgitated by the devil (more…)

For The Krillin Fans

Dragonball z has been around about as long as I have, and it’s been an influential part of the lives of a lot of people around the globe, including me. I thought I’d combine my two favourite characters into the pic below, and put old K-dogg to the fore because, as we all know, he gets a bung deal most of the time. I’d done this as a random doodle years ago, and then lost it. It’s wanted redrawing ever since.

kvsv

Tis the Season

Santa’s bristling beard! Serabella is now available for free download! It would be on Kindle, too, but for reasons best known to them, it’s not. But a dollar and change ain’t so bad.

Fresh from a month down south falling off rocks, I’ve come back ready and armed with more content to add to the site. There will be a pretty hefty  gap while my main work is being edited, so in the meantime, I’ll soon be uploading shorter works, for free. It’s based in the same world, just about 600 years further back, making for new settings, new characters, and new (more…)

In the Helm!

Just found this through a link! Definitely gets me psyched to don steel and leather and run about a basketball court walloping people with weapons!

Review: The Demon Cycle, Peter V. Brett

I’m definitely one for picking new books to read based solely on their covers. That’s changed somewhat since I started reading on a device rather than books, but generally, if the jacket looks rad, I’ll make the assumption that the meat inside it will follow accordingly. Occasionally I’ve been horribly wrong, but for what I enjoy reading, at least in a fantasy sense, I get it right more often than not.

So I’d seen The Painted Man (Peter V. Brett) on the shelves for ages, and thought it looked vaguely interesting (the cover, that is), but just not enough to compel me to actually (more…)

The Adventurer’s Daughter: Part One

Coming soon! As yet we don’t have a cover, so until then, here’s the blurb:

“Gaeliam ‘Musty’ Fotherington was the greatest Adventurer of his time, perhaps the greatest there ever was. There was never a challenge he couldn’t overcome, no danger too dire, no peril too bleak or adversary too evil. He’d been from one end of the Empire to the other and everywhere in between, climbed unscalable mountains, done battle with monsters most foul and spoken the unspeakable, and that was all before morning tea.

While he had amassed a king’s ransom of ancient crowns and lost swords and priceless stones during (more…)

The end is nigh

For the past six weeks or so I’ve been obsessively working on the edit of The Adventurer’s Daughter: Part One. It’s been a long process to say the least. As I’m a complete novice at this type of thing, I’ve had to make it up as I go along, but for this one I hit upon a pretty good method which seems, so far, to be working well.

The first step is to run through the entire 200k word manuscript with a red pen, picking up all the inconsistencies I can, and then go back into the file and read each chapter (more…)

What I hear, what I think

 

While waiting for a train the other day, I overheard a pair of our delightful New Zealand youth engaged in polite conversation. Here, kids have a peculiar way of using the word ‘ASK’, which makes for, potentially, hilarious consequences. As per below.

WHAT I HEAR

panel one

WHAT I THINK

imma axe yo mum

Trilogy of Two

If you’re a bit of a fan of the epic fantasy genre you’ll know that, generally, they come in threes. Bad luck is said to come in threes as well. Coincidence? Nope. It’s because of extremely good luck that a fantasy trilogy is even in print at all.

Tolkien started the whole trilogy thing. Writing in a time of mass world upheaval and a sparseness of pretty much everything, not only printing materials, The Rings was just too freakin’ long to be produced as one volume. Allen and Unwin told him that it would be too pricey to do, what, and suggested (more…)

Somnolence

In other words, I is needing the sleepy times.

We all suffer from certain periods of time distortion, for example you might be sitting on a bus en route to a job interview. Normally that bus ride is the longest, most tedious five hours in existence, even though it only takes 5 minutes. But on the way to that interview, that 5 minutes takes approximately three seconds.

Same goes for the reverse. When you’re on the way to the shop to buy that nice pair of pantaloons you’ve been saving up for, it takes bloody ages. Same goes for sitting at a laptop (more…)